I have just been reading through the archives of such a touching blog. 700 Pounds Is As Bad As It Sounds, is a blog being written by an anonymous blogger, who for now I think is going with the name J.D. Pounds, and he is documenting his efforts to turn his life around and get healthy.
He writes honestly about the things he has to deal with daily, being so large. About the pain, and discomfort he experiences from just standing up. Even sitting down isn't a load off, with so much weight causing a lot of pressure and swelling on his limbs.
I am just blown away by the commitment that this man, who has it so tough, is working so hard to do well, turn his life around and get healthy. Working so hard to save his life. He has only just starting and has a long way to go, but already he has progressed in the two months since he started. He can now walk four times as far as as he could in July. He has set himself a few goals that he's already met, and is getting better at recognising his food triggers and behaviours that he has to learn to confront and deal with.
It makes me ashamed that I've been trying to lose weight, get fit and healthy, and I've made no progress in 6 months. None. I'm still just as overweight as I was when I started. I'm no fitter and no healthier for myself. I've been able to come up with so many excuses, or put other priorities first, that really, I've not been as committed as I should be.
And I need to be. I'm carrying too much weight, and I'm not very fit and I'm not getting any younger. I need to lose weight so I can reduce pressure on my knee. I used to love being active and now, I shirk from it and avoid it. I want to lose weight so I can feel more comfortable in my clothes. I'm sick of buying larger clothes "as a temporary measure" just until I lose some weight. I'm sick of the waistband of my clothes cutting into me everytime I sit down, let alone lean forward. I'm sick of being out of breath everytime I go up a flight of stairs. I'm sick of the fact that every time I want to leave the house, it becomes an ordeal of 'what can I wear that won't make me feel fat'. I'm sick of feeling lumpy and clumsy and can't walk between rows of chairs because I bump into every one because I am so wide.
I can do so much better and I need to do so much better.